Night

Dear Alyssa,

What is it with night time. Some nights are okay I can fall asleep without any trouble. Other nights I lay down in bed wide awake for hours, waiting for sleep to come.  Some nights when sleep comes I have a dreamless sleep and other nights I have horrible dreams, dreams that relive some of the worst days and moments any mother could ever experience. Then there are the wonderful nights where the dreams are fantastic, they include you.  You are happy,  healthy and showing me something new or showing me something beautiful. I love those nights...those are the nights that show me that you and I are connected,  you are still a part of my everyday, my every moment. It is just as precious to me as the moments that I was able to share with you in your all too brief time here in our arms. If I were to ask you for anything it would be to have more of those nights where I have dreams of you happy, healthy and showing me something new or even the same things just so long as the dreams are good and with you in them. I miss u so much and I love you more than all of the stars in the sky seen and unseen times infinity. I will see you in my dreams angel.
Love always,
Mommy